its crazy when you think about it, we dont really know anyone and no one really knows us..we never can really tell what someones thinking or how someone feels..no one is completely honest, not even to themselves. in the end were just alone. we might as well try to get to know ourselves, its the only person we can ever fully know and always be with.

were just walking around in a world full of children in adult bodies

w.e i’m rambling now, I’ve gotten 3 hours of sleep in 3 days, i’m out of it

I’m so pessimistic it’s disgusting…I see a cute little new born dog and in my head I’m like “…whats the point of pets..they just die…one day that man will grow up with his puppy and the puppy will die…then the man would be heart broken because the dog he grew up with died..whats the point of life? its like playing a video game then all of a sudden the memory gets erased..its like everything you’ve tried to accomplish was pointless..its like getting your xbox smashed”

wtf

wow 

One thing I noticed is that a lot of people who aren’t all that in any way, have extremely ridiculous high standards, they list the things they want in their partner, mostly physical things, “He has to have brown long hair and blue eyes, and he HAS to be six feet tall” “She has to be white, and have big boobs” If you’re a shallow superficial asshole, what type of person do you think you’ll end up with? A SHALLOW SUPERFICIAL ASSHOLE! Goodluck, you really don’t have much going for you. And you wonder why all guys/girls are the same? Take a look at yourself, you’re only attracting the same types of people into your life because of the way you go about things. Who would date you anyways if you act like that? AN ASSHOLE! and you cry and moan about how every guy/girl is the same, well, you’re an asshole, it’s very rare that a nice person dates an asshole, if they do it ends quickly.

“I’d never date a black chick/dude” really I don’t get it you’re missing out on so many people for only limiting yourself to one race, I don’t understand it. I find beauty in all races and you’ll miss out on so many great people for doing what you do. Your ‘soul mate’ could be right in front of you, but you won’t even give them the time of day because of their race. 

It’s horse shit.

EDIT: Actually, how the fuck do you even have the guts to say such a stupid thing? It’s a major turn off. Ugghh. For shits sake I know people in their 30’s who say that shit, grow up already.

It makes me so sad, how quickly someone so important to me can walk out of my life and never come back. Were family, we live like a block away and I never see them. We talk on facebook sometimes but that’s not good enough at all. My only ‘family’ member that lives close. All my other family members live about 6 hours away, and I miss a lot of them and never get to see them, half the time it’s really awkward when I see some of them cause it’s like we don’t even have a relationship. I must say I get pretty jealous when I see the close bonds people have with their cousins, I barely even know mine and I can’t warm up to them cause I never even see them. :/ and it kills me to know that a family member is so sick and I can’t be there for them, and that I have to wait a year to see them, not even for long.

All these naked people getting posed on facebook and tumblr are totally desensitizing me to the human body. :’(

I just feel like I’m lucid dreaming when I’m awake, things just so obscure, everything, life, especially the life that were lead to believe, how people act. Routines trip me out so badly, haha I really don’t need drugs to trip, I trip out on life everyday. Why does our level of intelligence have to be based on a fucking piece of paper, or numbers? Why does our level of success have to be based on how much money we make or if we have a car or not? All we are our numbers. I know plenty of people who haven’t been to college or even dropped out who are smarter than people with degrees. I really think school is bullshit, we shouldn’t have to pay to get an education anyways, I think all school teaches you is how to fit in, and tell people what they want to hear, now a days if you don’t, they try to label your kid with all different types of bullshit disorders, or try to prescribe them bullshit drugs. I hate how my history class leaves out so much that’s important. They tell us other places leave out massive parts of history, why wouldn’t we do the same?  And fuck I hate it when I’m writing and people won’t stop talking to me or blasting music.

of course stupid people are going to want to try bath salts after all the incidents that occurred, and there are a lot of stupid people out there, and eventually all stupid people will try bath salts then turn even more zombish then they already are. I thought the mindless non stop texting with their mouths open was bad enough, but now they will be eating each others flesh, eh maybe its not so bad, less stupid people to worry about when they’re all eating each others flesh for fun.

This is what I thought about at four in the morning last night when I couldn’t sleep.

Life doesn’t seem real, it’s been tripping me out lately, all the things that are happening around the world, the way people act,the way things are, and all the new discovery’s are like something you’d read from a fiction book. I really don’t think this life is real, I sort of just think it’s just an illusion or a dream. Sometimes my dreams seem more real than life. I dunno, I believe in reincarnation and I don’t believe in heaven or hell, I think we choose where we want to be born just for the experience and I believe the soul is something that is endless. My thought of that also trips me out though, to think that WE are endless, I dunno think about it, it’s estimated that there are hundreds of billions of galaxies in the universe, endless. Were smaller than a microscopic bacteria floating in the ocean compared to the universe. 

Just thoughts/ideas/opinions, :p if you disagree no need to bash me, but I’m interested in reading others thoughts about life and death.

I know people were always fucked up but it’s seriously getting worse. Stories on the news and articles I read make me sick. I went for a walk earlier and this woman said to her son who was riding a tricycle (he looked about three) “Is there something wrong with your goddamn brain? You must get it from your fucking father, you look funny and walk funny too, don’t lean on one side or you’re going to fall”

I dunno, it really bothered me and I cried, life isn’t fair, people who don’t even want to have kids, or don’t take care of them properly just keep popping them out, while there’s people out there who want kids more than anything but can’t have them, and would treat them soo great. Don’t have a kid if you’re not going to properly care for them…I just don’t understand how people could say things like that to their own child.

:’/

truth is we are all insecure about something, despite how attractive we appear to others, or how popular we are to others, it’s the truth..it saddens me, if only we could have the constant grip, constant feeling, or sight of our TRUE selves and feel that constant beautiful feeling of self-hood and enlightenment, I guess only then we would see, only then we would realize how immense, and amazing we are as a human being.

what do i have to do to prove to you/that i’ll love you no matter what we go through/id do anything to make sure you’re not upset/but all the things i tell you, you always seem to forget/i’ll do anything to prove to you/that i love you and ill never hurt you/ill rip my heart out of my chest and hand it to you/i’ll cut my ear off and mail it to you/everytime im with you it seems to good to be true/i cant grasp what im feeling..cant grasp what im seeing/i really must be dreaming/every time i think about how i want the seconds to last/5 hours pass/i want to stop time from going by so fast/your presence is equivalent to laughing gas/when your words hit my ears/ they have the power of laughter but also tears/you helped me get rid of all of my fears/helped me get rid of my insecurites and make me feel pretty/all in all, you’re yellow and i’m blue/i’ll love you no matter what we go through/green is what we make when were together/youre my other half and ill love you forever

random thoughts …

things always change, but in someways stay the same/I define myself, then redefine, all the time/I always second guess, life’s a game of chess/sometimes I feel like the queen, sometimes I feel like the pawn/either way I can loose this game fast then I’m gone..I wish I could stop thinking/to save myself from sinking/then I’ll be free/Only then I’ll be me

I’m really trying hard not to be like you/I’m sorry to say you’re something I don’t want to turn into/I try not to repeat your mistakes/I doubt myself I don’t know if I got what it takes/I see a glimpse off my future and it makes me ache…Mistake after mistake, same mistakes repeated/It makes me feel conceited, ashamed, defeated…I’ll always love you, regardless of how much you put me through. Sometimes I feel the only way to succeed, is to just straight pack up and leave. I guess it just hurts me to see you this way..and that’s just really what I wish I could say.