I dunno little weird things bother me..

Like when the popular kid with ‘confidence’ ( or just fucking stupidity?) doesn’t laugh on his own, and has to seek approval before laughing at a joke..

If he thinks one is funny, he has to wait if others are laughing and look at them to laugh, or will even laugh at a joke he doesn’t get if every one else is laughing…Even if a group of kids make a statement or a gesture, such as an “YAAA!” that kid looks lost in his own world, I’m extremely sure he had no fucking idea with what was going on, but he snaps out if his mind and goes like “yaa. Haha!” (a little to late to even seem natural) like, oh look at me! I fit in! Hi! Collectivism at it’s fucking best. 

I don’t know I just HATE it when people don’t laugh on their own and only laugh when others laugh. Am I the only one who has witnessed this?

haha on christmas what does my moms ex say to me? if he raised me i would have came out better and that my dads a piece of shit. awesome

working out with 5 bulging disks that are loosing fluid is sooo tough :( but I still do it :/ if I don’t it gets numb and tingly 

Prolly delete this soon. It just sucks. Getting gawked at hurts just as much as being called fat and ugly. I’m tired of guys looking at me like I’m just there to impress them, just there for them to look at, I’m tired of them picking on me telling me I’m fat or ugly, or rating me or them asking me to make them fuckinggoddamnsandwiches. Telling me I look 12 when I don’t wear makeup because ‘women are expected to wear makeup.’ Some act really nice at first, then realize they won’t get sex so they ditch me then never speak to me again, a ton have forced themselves on me, forcefully kissed me, or grabbed my boobs and butt like its fine, like I don’t have feelings or something. Some just say “Hi wanna fuck?” or “Hey you should send me nudes :)” Its humiliating. After this one guy grabbed me, I bitched him out then he asked me out, EXPECTING ME TO SAY YES! I’m tired of being thought of as just a body or something to be used for sex, which I don’t even have promiscuous sex (if you know me you know I don’t do that, proof they don’t even get a chance to know me). I’m a fucking person, I have feelings, I’d say I’m a pretty nice somewhat intelligent person with a huge range of interests who can kick a guys ass at video games, and most of the guys around here don’t even get a chance to know me before they fucking grab me, ask me out or ask for sex. They think buying me a slice of pizza is an invitation into my vagina. No. I don’t care about how much money you have, or how many exes you’ve had or if you’re trying to make me jealous or if you got new shoes, I hear that all the time please just talk about something interesting, WONDER, THINK, FEEL, FUCKING QUESTION, SOMETHING! Whats so wrongs with a smile, or a ‘how are you’ or a “you’re pretty” or “oh wow you like that band me too lets talk about music” what the fuck. I’d rather have a friend than boyfriend anyway, most don’t even wanna know me or get to be friends. I think I have a lot to offer but no one will ever know.

I just want to be treated like a normal person, not an object. :/ My luck sucks. I just want to have a normal conversation with someone around here.

Why do I even try to loose weight, or look pretty..Why am I so damn insecure when I’m surrounded by a ton of assholes who I hate…I give up screw everyone. I can’t remember the last person I had a crush on (besideshenryrollins) It takes way to much effort to impress people you don’t even like.

I just feel like I’m lucid dreaming when I’m awake, things just so obscure, everything, life, especially the life that were lead to believe, how people act. Routines trip me out so badly, haha I really don’t need drugs to trip, I trip out on life everyday. Why does our level of intelligence have to be based on a fucking piece of paper, or numbers? Why does our level of success have to be based on how much money we make or if we have a car or not? All we are our numbers. I know plenty of people who haven’t been to college or even dropped out who are smarter than people with degrees. I really think school is bullshit, we shouldn’t have to pay to get an education anyways, I think all school teaches you is how to fit in, and tell people what they want to hear, now a days if you don’t, they try to label your kid with all different types of bullshit disorders, or try to prescribe them bullshit drugs. I hate how my history class leaves out so much that’s important. They tell us other places leave out massive parts of history, why wouldn’t we do the same?  And fuck I hate it when I’m writing and people won’t stop talking to me or blasting music.

Dropping my guitar was the worst thing I ever done, ever. It was one thing that made me happy and made me feel alive, I don’t care if I was bad back then, I’m worse now because I dropped it, I admit I was decent at the time, it at least made me happy and feel alive, it was always there for me, now I have no escape, I can’t even look at it or bare to pick it up because I suck so bad at it now. It pisses me off.

Lesson learned, do what makes YOU happy, don’t give a shit what people think, do what makes you feel alive.

Wasted talent is the saddest thing to see. So pursue yours.

at work, how i smile to my asshole customers, i imagine beating the shit out of them with a full steaming pot of coffee, then i say with a huge ass smile “HAVE A GREAT DAY :D come again!”

you know…i really don’t think death should be celebrated…regardless of how horrible the person is…it goes to show just how sick and barbaric humanity is…and people keep complaining about a lot of shit…the worlds in our hands dudes its up to us to change it, if you got that whole ‘shits going nowhere attitude’ you know where shits going to go? think positively, stop focusing on the bad, think about good shit happening, become a better person, please don’t make our species look this ignorant and disgusting…ahh…

“I mourn the loss of thousands of precious lives, but I will not rejoice in the death of one - not even an enemy. Returning hate for hate multiplies hate - adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.”

I hate it when people say they LOVE photography, and their portfolio is just filled with pictures of themselves. Taking pictures of yourself if NOT art, get some talent and stop being so preoccupied with the thought of yourself.